Airline P.A. System
Things You Don't Want to Overhear On an Airline P.A. System ....
Ocean crossing flight: This is your Captain
speaking, I just wanted to take this time to
remind you that your seat cushions can be
used as floatation devices.
Hey folks, were going to play a little game
of geography trivia. If you can recognize
where we are, tell your flight attendant and
receive an extra pack of peanuts.
Our loss of altitude allows a unique close
up perspective of the local terrain. I assure
you that it's all part of our airlines new
commitment to make your a flight a sight
(As the plane turns around right after
takeoff)....uhhhhh....we have to go back ....
we ..we ....uhhhhhh ....forgot something.....
I'm sure everyone noticed the loss of an
engine, however the reduction in weight and
drag will mean we'll be flying much more
efficiently now. (ironic note: this is
actually true for prop aircraft!)
Fasten your seat belt. (same tone your friend
with the suicidal driving tendencies uses when
you get in the car)
This is your Captain speaking....these stupid
planes are a lot different than the ships I'm
used to.. so you'll have to give me some
It would be a good idea if right now everyone
closed their shades and watched the in-flight movie.
We've now reached our cruising altitude of
30,000 feet and ... Oh my
Don't worry! That one is always on E...
Get the parachutes ready...
Drinks are on me...
I'll have what the Captain's having...
[ Author Unknown -- from 'Buffalos Chips' (buffalos-g-jokes.yahoogroups.com) ]
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