Business Slogans

1. Plumber:
   "We repair what your husband Fixed."
   
   
2. Pizza shop slogan:
   "7 days without pizza makes one Weak."
   
   
3. At a tire shop in Milwaukee:
   "Invite us to your next blowout."
   
   
4. Door of a plastic surgeons office:
   "Hello, can we pick your nose?"
   
   
5. Sign at the psychic's Hotline:
   "Don't call us, we'll call you."
   
   
6. At A Laundry Shop:
   "How about we refund your money, send you a new one at no charge, close the store and have the manager shot. Would that be satisfactory?"
   
   
7. At a Towing Company:
   "We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
   
   
8. Billboard on the side of the road:
   "Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs."
   
   
9. On an Electricians truck:
   "Let us remove your shorts."
   
   
10. In a Nonsmoking Area:
    "If we see smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
    
    
11. On Maternity Room Door:
    "Push, Push, Push."
    
    
12. At an Optometrists Office "If you don't see what your looking for you've come to the right place."
    
    
13. On a Taxidermist's window:
    "We really know our stuff."
    
    
14. In a Podiatrist's office:
    "Time wounds all heels."
    
    
15. On a Butchers window:
    "Let me meat your needs."
    
    
16. On a fence:
    "Salesman Welcome, Dog food is expensive."
    
    
17. At a car Dealership:
    "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
    
    
18. Outside a Muffler Shop:
    "No appointment Necessary, we hear you coming."
    
    
19. Outside a Hotel:
    "Help! We need inn-experienced people."
    
    
20. On a desk in a reception room:
    "We shoot every 3rd salesman , and the 2nd one just left."
    
    
21. In a Veterinarians waiting room:
    "Be back in 5 minutes, Sit ! Stay!"
    
    
22. At the Electric Company:
    "We would be de-lighted if you send in your bill. However, if you don't you will be."
    
    
23. On the door of a Computer Store:
    "Out for a quick byte."
    
    
24. In a Restaurant window:
    "Don't stand there and be hungry, come on in and get fed up."
    
    
25. Inside a Bowling Alley:
    "Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop."
    
    
26. In the front yard of a funeral home:
    "Drive carefully, we'll wait."
    
    
27. In a counselors office:
    "Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional.

[ Author Unknown -- from 'Aiken Drum' (Aiken@AikensLaughs.com) ]