Time to brush up even if you're not Catholic! You never know
when, or by whom, you might be tested!
AMEN: The only part of a prayer that everyone knows.
BULLETIN: Your receipt for attending Mass.
CHOIR: A group of people whose singing allows the rest of
the Parish to
HOLY WATER: A liquid whose chemical formula is H2OLY.
HYMN: A song of praise usually sung in a key three octaves
higher than that of the congregation's range.
INCENSE: Holy Smoke!
JESUITS: An order of priests known for their ability to
colleges with good basketball teams.
JONAH: The original "Jaws" story.
JUSTICE: When kids have kids of their own.
KYRIE ELEISON: The only Greek words that most Catholics can
recognize besides gyros and baklava
MAGI: The most famous trio to attend a baby shower.
MANGER: Where Mary gave birth to Jesus because Joseph wasn't
covered by an HMO. The Bible's way of showing us that
holiday travel has always been rough.
PEW: A medieval torture device still found in Catholic
PROCESSION: The ceremonial formation at the beginning of
Mass consisting of altar servers, the celebrant, and late
parishioners looking for seats.
RECESSIONAL: The ceremonial procession at the conclusion of
Mass led by parishioners trying to beat the crowd to the
RECESSIONAL HYMN: The last song at Mass often sung a little
more quietly, since most of the people have already left.
RELICS: People who have been going to Mass for so long,
they actually know when to sit, kneel, and stand.
TEN COMMANDMENTS: The most important Top Ten list not
given by David Letterman.
USHERS: The only people in the parish who don't know the
seating capacity of a pew.
[ Author Unknown -- from Lorraine, via 'LAB Laughs' (LABLaughsClean@topica.com) ]
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