You know your parish has gone over the electronic communications
"It's getting so bad," I said to my colleague, "that pretty soon if
you forget your contribution envelope, there'll be one of those
credit card slides in your pew so you can charge it."
The pastor reads his sermon from a palm-held computer "notepad."
There are cell-phone chargers next to the pew-pencil drill holes.
MCI takes out full-page ads in the parish bulletin.
At the parish flea market, used cell phones and answering machines outnumber
bowling balls, blenders and electric can openers.
When the bells are rung following the consecration, half the
congregation reaches into pockets or purses to see if it was for
them. (Theologically speaking, of course, it was.)
The parish not only has an Internet web site, the parish council
has discussed petitioning the bishop to change the parish name to
"All Saints Domain"
Everyone in the parish assumes everyone knows what "domain" means
People without email addresses are known as "the needy"
As an April Fool's Day joke on the pastor, several of the
teenagers hid their pagers around his office, then called them all
simultaneously. Apparently it did not startle him. He said he felt
like he was at Sunday liturgy.
During coffee and doughnuts after Mass, people are overheard
wondering if confession by email would be "licit." Someone thinks
"licit" is the name of a new software company.
A petition is circulating to partition the crying room, creating a
To quiet fussy 2-year-olds, handing them pagers on "vibrate" is
more common than handing them Cheerios.
Five-year-olds actually do say, "deliver us some email" during the
Our Father rather than "deliver us from evil."
"You mean your parish still uses envelopes?" he asked.
[ Author Unknown -- from 'Buffalos Chips' (buffalos-g-jokes.yahoogroups.com) ]
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