House For Sale sign - comment: House NOT Haunted.

Glossary of Terms for Home Seekers

If you are currently perusing those ads in the Real Estate section of your local newspaper in hopes of finding "THE House", here are some terms which you will constantly encounter. A familiarization with these terms may save you hours of fruitless looking. Here they are:

Ad Term What it REALLY Means

"cozy" small
"lush landscaping" overgrown
"low maintainence yard" concrete
"cute starter home" not much, but it's small and cheap
"nostalgic" it's OLD
"good ventilation" no air conditioning
"home with a view" it doesn't face a wall
"freeway convenient" you could build a private on-ramp from the backyard!
"Hillside property!" Watch Your Step!
"Highly upgraded" It has carpets
"Older Spanish Style" Adobe hut
"Fixer-upper" It's a mess
"Needs a little TLC" It's a mess
"lots of potential here!" It's a mess
"Perfect for children" They can't hurt this one
"Mature neighborhood" It's all downhill from here!
"Owner desperate" He can't give it away
"Close to schools/shopping" Right next door
"Must see to believe" This house is unimaginable!
[ By Margaret Long -- received from Chris Long at 'Laugh & Lift' ( ]

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