A businessman was attending a conference in Africa. He had a free
day and wanted to play a round of golf. He was directed to a golf
course in the nearby jungle. After a short journey, he arrived at
the course and asked the pro if he could to play.
"Sure," said the Pro, " But what's your handicap?"
Not wanting to admit that he had an 18 handicap, he decided to cut
it a bit. "Well, it's 16," said the businessman,"But what's the
relevance since I'll be playing alone."
"No, it's very important for us to know," said the pro who then
called a caddy. "Go out with this gentleman," said the Pro, "his
handicap is 16." The businessman was very surprised at this constant
reference to his handicap. The caddy picked up the businessman's bag
and a large rifle; again the businessman was surprised but decided
to ask no questions.
They arrived on the 1st hole, a par 4. "Please avoid those trees on
the left," said the caddy. Needless to say, the businessman
duck-hooked his ball into the trees. He found his ball and was about
to punch it out when he heard the loud crack of the rifle and a
large snake fell dead from a tree above his head. The caddy stood
next to him with the rifle smoking in his hand. "That's the mamba,
the most poisonous snake in all Africa; you're lucky I was here with
After taking a bogey on the hole, they moved to the 2nd, a par 5.
"Avoid those bushes on the right," says the caddy. Of course, the
businessman's ball went slicing away into the bushes. As he went to
pick up his ball, he heard the loud crack of the caddy's rifle once
more and a huge lion fell dead at his feet. "I've saved your life
again," said the caddy.
The 3rd hole was a par 3 with a lake in front of the green. The
businessman's ball came up just short of the green and rolled back
to the edge of the water. To take a shot, he had to stand with one
foot in the lake. As he was about to swing, a large crocodile
emerged from the water and bit off much of his right leg. As he fell
to the ground bleeding and in great pain, he saw the caddy with the
rifle propped at his side, looking on unconcernedly.
"Why didn't you shoot it?" asked the man incredulously.
"I'm sorry, sir," said the caddy, "this is the 17th handicap hole,
you don't get a shot here."
[ Author Unknown -- from 'Buffalos Chips' (buffalos-g-jokes.yahoogroups.com) ]
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