Horoscopes For Your Job Position
MARKETING: You are ambitious yet stupid. You chose a
marketing degree to avoid having to study in college, concentrating
instead on drinking and socializing which is pretty much what your
job responsibilities are now. Least compatible with Sales.
SALES: Laziest of all signs, often referred to as "marketing
without a degree." You are also self centered and paranoid. Unless
someone calls you and begs you to take their money, you like to
avoid contact with customers so you can "concentrate on the big
picture." You seek admiration for your golf game throughout your life.
TECHNOLOGY: Unable to control anything in your personal life,
you are instead content to completely control everything that
happens at your workplace. Often even YOU don't understand what
you are saying but who the heck can tell. It is written that Geeks shall
inherit the Earth.
ENGINEERING: One of only two signs that actually studied in
school. It is said that ninety percent of all Personal Ads are placed
by engineers. You can be happy with yourself; your office is full of all
the latest "ergodynamic" gadgets. However, we all know what is
really causing your "carpal tunnel syndrome."
ACCOUNTING: The only other sign that studied in school. You
are mostly immune from office politics. You are the most feared
person in the organization; combined with your extreme
organizational traits, the majority of rumors concerning you say that
you are completely insane. Oh, and usually the first to be
HUMAN RESOURCES: Ironically, given your access to
confidential information, you tend to be the biggest gossip within the
organization. Possibly the only other person that does less work
than marketing, you are unable to return any calls today because you
have to get a haircut, have lunch AND then mail a letter.
MANAGEMENT/MIDDLE MANAGEMENT: Catty, cut-throat, yet
completely spineless, you are destined to remain at your current job
for the rest of your life. Unable to make a single decision you tend to
measure your worth by the number of meetings you can schedule for
yourself. Best suited to marry other "Middle Managers" as everyone
in you social circle is a "Middle Manager."
SENIOR MANAGEMENT: See above - Same sign, different title.
CUSTOMER SERVICE: Bright, cheery, positive, you are a fifty
cent cab ride from taking your own life. As children very few of you
asked your parents for a little cubicle for your room and a headset
so you could pretend to play "Customer Service." Continually
passed over for promotions, your best bet is to sleep with your
CONSULTANT: Lacking any specific knowledge, you use
acronyms to avoid revealing your utter lack of experience. You have
convinced yourself that your "skills" are in demand, and that you
could get a higher paying job with any other organization in a
heartbeat. You will spend an eternity contemplating these career
opportunities without ever taking direct action.
RECRUITER, "HEADHUNTER": As a "person" that profits from
the success of others, you are disdained by most people who
actually work for a living. Paid on commission and susceptible to
alcoholism, your ulcers and frequent heart attacks correspond
directly with fluctuations in the stock market.
PARTNER, PRESIDENT, CEO: You are brilliant or lucky. Your
inability to figure out complex systems such as the fax machine
suggest the latter.
[ Author Unknown -- from 'keepAhead' (support@keepAhead.com) ]
All Rights Reserved.