Murphy's Church Laws

  • Film projectors always work before the class meeting begins.

  • The probability of the preacher tripping over the mike cord is greater on "Bring A Friend" Sunday than any other week.

  • The largest Bible Class will show up when the teacher feels his/her worst.

  • No matter how many bulletins you print, you'll always need one more.

  • A member living 15 miles away will be 15 minutes early; Members living two blocks will be 15 minutes late.

  • Saying "Let us Pray" or singing "Just as I Am" causes babies to cry.

  • The shorter the agenda, the longer the business meeting.

  • Business meetings ALWAYS last at least 15 minutes longer than they should. (So do some sermons)

  • Church committees should be made up of three members, two of whom should be absent at every meeting. (William Spurgeon)

  • When you answer the Bible teacher's question right, nobody remembers; when you are wrong, nobody forgets.

  • The longest Scripture readings always come with the longest sermons.

  • The furnace only fails when the outside temperature is more than 20 degrees below zero. The air conditioner only fails when the outside temperature is 90 degrees or above.

  • When the preacher misspeaks in a sermon, at least half of those taking notes will write the remark down as an important thought from the sermon.

[ Garden City Church of Christ Bulletin -- from Georgia L. Boring, via Keith Todd ]


Inspirational Humor     SkyWriting.Net     All Rights Reserved.