On Being Bald . . .

  • If a man is bald in front, he's a thinker.

  • If he's bald in the back, he is a lover.

  • If he's bald in front and back, he thinks he's a lover.

  • "Papa, are you growing taller all the time?" "No my child. Why do you ask?" " 'Cause the top of your head is poking up through your hair."

  • He has wavy hair... it's waving goodbye.

  • He's not baldheaded... he just has flesh-colored hair.

  • There's one proverb that really depresses him: 'Hair today, gone tomorrow.'

  • He's so bald that it looks like his neck is blowing a bubble.

  • There's one thing about baldness... it's neat.

  • There's a new remedy on the market for baldness. It's made of alum and persimmon juice. It doesn't grow hair, but it shrinks your head to fit what hair you have.

  • He has less hair to comb, but more face to wash.

  • It's not that he's baldheaded... he just has a tall face.

[ Author Unknown -- from Aiken Drum ]


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