Out Of The Mouths Of Men
Means: "I'm going to drink myself dangerously stupid, and stand by a stream with a stick in my hand, while the fish swim by in complete safety."
Means: "There is no rational thought pattern connected with it, and you have no chance at all of making it logical."
Means: "Why isn't dinner already on the table?"
Means: Absolutely nothing. It's a conditioned response.
Means: "I have no idea how it works."
Means: "I was busy admiring that redhead over there."
Means: "I can't hear the game over the vacuum cleaner."
Means: "Are you still talking?"
Means: "I remember the theme song to 'F Troop', the address of the first girl I ever kissed, and the vehicle identification numbers of every car I've ever owned, but I forgot your birthday."
Means: "The girl selling them on the corner was a real babe."
Means: "I have actually severed a limb, but will bleed to death before I admit that I am hurt."
Means: "And I sure hope I think of some pretty good reasons soon."
Means: "It didn't fall into my outstretched hands, so I'm completely clueless."
Means: "What did you catch me at?"
Means: "I haven't the foggiest clue what you just said, and am hoping desperately that I can fake it well enough so that you don't spend the next 3 days yelling at me."
Means: "I am used to the way you yell at me, and realize it could be worse."
Means: "Please don't try on one more outfit, I'm starving."
Means: "No one will ever see us alive again."
[ Author Unknown -- from 'Buffalos Chips' (buffalos-g-jokes.yahoogroups.com) ]
Inspirational Humor SkyWriting.Net All Rights Reserved.