Strange and Funny Signs

• Pizza Shop Slogan: "7 days without pizza makes one weak."
  
  
• On a Plumbers truck: "Don't sleep with a drip.
  Call your plumber."
  
  
• On a Septic Tank Truck sign: "We're #1 in the #2 business."
  
  
• Sign over a Gynecologist's Office: "Dr. Jones, at your cervix.
  
  
• At a Proctologist's door "To expedite your visit please back in."
  
  
• On a Plumbers truck: "We repair what your husband fixed."
  
  
• At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee: "Invite us to your next blowout."
  
  
• On a Plastic Surgeon's Office door:
  "Hello. Can we pick your nose?"
  
  
• At a Towing company: "We don't charge an arm and a leg.
  We just want your 'tows'."
  
  
• On an Electrician's truck: "Let us remove your shorts."
  
  
• In a Nonsmoking Area: "If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
  
  
• On a Maternity Room door: "Push. Push. Push."
  
  
• At an Optometrist's office: "If you don't see what you're looking for, you've come to the right place."
  
  
• On a Taxidermist's window: "We really know our stuff."
  
  
• In a Podiatrist's office: "Time wounds all heels."
  
  
• On a Fence: "Salesmen welcome! Dog food is expensive."
  
  
• At a Car Dealership: "The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment."
  
  
• Outside a Muffler Shop: "No appointment necessary. We hear you coming."
  
  
• In a Veterinarian's waiting room: "Be back in 5 minutes.
  Sit! Stay!"
  
  
• At a Radiator Shop: "Best place in town to take a leak."
  
  
• At the Electric Company: "We would be 'delighted' if you send in your payment. However, if you don't, you will be."
  
  
• In a Restaurant window: "Don't stand there and be hungry, come on in and get fed up.
  
  
• At a Propane Filling Station "Tank heaven for little 'grills'."
  
  
• In the front yard of a Funeral Home: "Drive carefully. We'll wait."

[ Author Unknown -- from 'andychaps_the-funnies' ]