Technically Challenged? Think Again!

Take heart, anyone among you who believes you are technologically challenged, you "ain't seen nuthin' yet." This is an excerpt from a "Wall Street Journal" article.

1. HP/Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is.
   
   
2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the plastic bag the mouse was packaged in.
   
   
3. A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy disk back in the drive and close the door. The customer asked the 'tech to hold on and was heard putting the phone down, getting up and crossing the room to close the door (to the room).
   
   
4. Another Dell customer called to say he couldn't get his computer to print anything. After 40 minutes of troubleshooting, the technician discovered the man was trying to print a piece of paper by holding it in front of the monitor screen and pressing the "Print Screen" key.
   
   
5. Yet another Dell customer called to complain that his keyboard no longer worked. He had cleaned it by filling up his bath tub with soap and water, and soaked the keyboard for a day. Then he removed all the key buttons and washed them individually.
   
   
6. A confused caller to IBM was having trouble printing documents. He told the technician that the computer had said it "couldn't find printer." The user said he tried turning the computer screen to face the printer, but that his computer still said: "couldn't find printer."
   
   
7. An exasperated caller to Dell Tech Support couldn't get her new Dell Computer to turn-on. After ensuring the computer was plugged in, the technician asked her what happened when she pushed the power button. Her response, "I pushed and pushed on the foot pedal, but nothing happens." The "foot pedal" turned out to be the computer's mouse.
   
   
8. A woman called the Canon help desk with a problem with her printer. The 'tech asked her if she was running it under "Windows." The woman responded, "No, my desk is next to the door. But that is a good point -- because the man sitting in the cubicle next to me is under a window, and his printer is working fine."
   
   
9. Tech Support (reportedly a true dialog):
   "Bob, press the Control and Escape keys
   at the same time. That brings up a task list
   in the middle of the screen. Now press the
   letter 'P' to bring up the Program Manager."
   Customer: "I don't see a "P".
   Tech: "The keyboard, Bob."
   Customer: "What do you mean,  'P' ?"
   Tech: "On your keyboard, Bob."
   Customer: "I'm not going to do that!!!"
   

[ Author Unknown -- from John Traver -- Ed:anon. ]