How to Turn Down Unwanted Men

    1. HE --- Can I buy you a drink?
      SHE - Actually I'd rather have the money.

    2. HE --- I'm a photographer. I've been looking for a face like yours.
      SHE - I'm a plastic surgeon. I've been looking for a face like yours.

    3. HE --- Hi... Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
      SHE - Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

    4. HE --- How did you get to be so beautiful?
      SHE - I must've been given your share.

    5. HE --- Will you go out with me this Saturday?
      SHE - Sorry. I'm having a headache this weekend.

    6. HE --- Your face must turn a few heads.
      SHE - And your face must turn a few stomachs.

    7. HE --- Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out.
      SHE - Okay, get out.

    8. HE --- I think I could make you very happy.
      SHE - Why? Are you leaving?

    9. HE --- What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
      SHE - Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

    10. HE --- Can I have your name?
      SHE - Why? Don't you already have one?

    11. HE --- Shall we go see a movie?
      SHE - I've already seen it.

    12. HE --- Where have you been all my life?
      SHE - Hiding from you.

    13. HE --- Haven't I seen you some place before?
      SHE - Yes. That's why I don't go there anymore.

    14. HE --- Is this seat empty?
      SHE - Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

    15. HE --- So, what do you do for a living?
      SHE - I'm a female impersonator.

[ Author Unknown -- from 'Buffalos Chips' ( ]


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