Ways To Ward Off Burglars
The following are a few simple ways to keep burglars out of
the house by putting a few signs in well-placed locations.
- Dear Mr. Butcher, starting tomorrow, please leave eight
pounds of meat for Brutus. Six pounds only makes him angry
- Dear Mr. Mailman, we found bloodstains all over our mail.
They must be yours. The next time you put mail into our
slot, please be sure to keep all parts of your body well
clear of all openings. P.S. - Any sign of that book we sent
for, "The Care and Feeding of Wild Jungle Cats"?
- Selma, don't come in! The boa constrictor got loose
- Dear Mr. Exterminator, be very careful when you go inside!
The termites have eaten through most of the floorboards
and you will fall into the basement where all of the rats
- To whom it may concern: Some of the items in this house
have been engraved with Federal Identification Numbers.
Others have merely been wired to explode when touched.
[ Author Unknown -- from 'Aiken Drum' ]
All Rights Reserved.