Why You'll Like Retirement

    1. Question: How many days in a week?
      Answer:   6 Saturdays and 1 Sunday.

    2. Question: When is a retiree's bedtime?
      Answer:   Three hours after he falls asleep on the couch.

    3. Question: How many retirees to change a light bulb?
      Answer:   Only one, but it might take all day.

    4. Question: What's the biggest gripe of retirees?
      Answer:   There is not enough time to get everything done.

    5. Question: Why don't retirees mind being called Seniors?
      Answer:   The term comes with a 10% percent discount.

    6. Question: Among retirees what is considered formal attire?
      Answer:   Tied shoes.

    7. Question: Why do retirees count pennies?
      Answer:   They are the only ones who have the time.

    8. Question: What is the common term for someone who enjoys work and refuses to retire?
      Answer:   NUTS! (I CAN RELATE TO THAT!)

    9. Question: Why are retirees so slow to clean out the basement, attic or garage?
      Answer:   They know that as soon as they do, one of their adult kids will want to store stuff there.

    10. Question: What do retirees call a long lunch?
      Answer:   Normal.

    11. Question: What is the best way to describe retirement?
      Answer:   The never ending Coffee Break.

    12. Question: What's the biggest advantage of going back to school as a retiree?
      Answer:   If you cut classes, no one calls your parents.

    13. Question: Why does a retiree often say he doesn't miss work, but misses the people he used to work with?
      Answer:   He is too polite to tell the whole truth. (THERE IS A LOT OF TRUTH TO THAT!)

[ Author Unknown -- Randy, via 'Buffalos Chips' (buffalos-g-jokes.yahoogroups.com) ]


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