You know you live in a small town.

You know you live in a small town when . . .

1. The town newspaper is published monthly.
   
   
2. It has an aquarium -- stocked with live minnows.
   
   
3. The town is named after EVERYONE'S distant relative.
   
   
4. It was founded on April Fools' Day as a practical joke.
   
   
5. The Ice Cream store has only two flavors, chocolate and vanilla.
   
   
6. There's no hospital -- only a first aid kit.
   
   
7. For fun on Saturday nights, people drive up and down main street.
   
   
8. There's no bank... as soon as someone gets enough money, they leave.
   
   
9. The only traffic jam's are caused when a farmer drives down Main Street on his combine.
   
   
10. The local phone book has a yellow page.
    
    
11. Third Street is on the edge of town.
    
    
12. The 7-11 is only open from 8 - 5.
    
    
13. The only road crossing Main Street is a dirt road.
    
    
14. At the last beauty contest, nobody won 2nd or 3rd place.
    
    
15. The one-block-long Main Street dead ends in both direction.
    
    
16. There's no place to go that you shouldn't.
    
    
17. "Night on the Town" takes only 11 minutes.
    
    
18. The New Year's baby was born in October.
    

[ Author Unknown -- from 'andychaps_the_funnnies' (andychaps_the-funnies-owner@yahoogroups.com) ]