Fear had gripped her heart in terror that that look had come to stay.
Tears unbidden streaked her make-up, pain had surely made its mark,
And she sat alone in silence, weeping till the sky grew dark.
"Tell me why, God! when I trusted You! O, Father, tell me why!
My existence must displease You, Lord ~ if so, then let me die!
I've no wish to be a Christian, I'm resigning, Lord, I'm through!
And I'll give back my salvation if it's all the same to You!"
Lightning she expected, sudden death at least, or more...
But no sound broke through the blackness, save her heart's own deafening roar.
"Don't You hear me, God? I'm quitting! I can't live the life of praise!
I'm a failure, Lord, a loser! This is where we two part ways!"
Still no answer came from Heaven, though she wailed and sobbed and wept.
When the sun's rays broke the darkness, in exhaustion then she slept.
While she tossed and turned in restlessness, the Lord God sent a dream,
Saying, "Child, I'll not abandon you, no matter how you scream!
"For I gave My Son to save you and He shed His blood for thee,
Thou art Mine, now and forever...you mean all the world to Me!
I'll not give you up, not ever...though you let go of My hand,
I know well how rough thy path is...yea, I fully understand.
"My own Spirit dwells within you, and He'll lead you on your way
Till you're safely in My arms, till you are Home at last to stay.
So, child, you see, it's not the fact that your hand's holding Mine...
It is I who hold you fast, child...it is My hand holding thine!"
"Now it is God who makes us
stand firm in Christ.
He anointed us,
set His seal of ownership on us,
and put His Spirit in our hearts
as a deposit,
guaranteeing what is to come."
(I Corinthians 2:22-22 NIV)