I've done it myself. Maybe you have, too.
In an effort to separate ourselves from life
for whatever reason, we attempt to build
These walls are made up of excuses, lies,
and denial. Like the ostrich we think by
burying our heads in the ground no one
can see us.
Life starts closing in on us and instead of
pushing back we begin to limit ourselves.
The barrier may begin with a refusal to
participate in something. A family party,
a gathering of friends. We shut the door
and lie to ourselves thinking no one cares.
"I won't be missed. They don't need me there."
Then it begins to show at work. We produce
less, expect nothing and get nothing in return.
We see it as life punishing us and why shouldn't
it. We are simply not worthy of it. Or so the lie
Layer by layer, piece by piece we dig deeper,
build higher until we have completely removed
Then while inside this invisible wall we have
created we begin to blame others for shutting
us out. The perceived darkness comes not
from the lack of light, but the self induced
blindness created by denial.
You begin to believe "There's no way out!"
"There's no way in."
But you're wrong.
There isn't a fortress, there isn't a barrier, there
isn't a negative thought, action or ideal that God
can't break through.
Like a leaky basement, a house built of brick,
or grave you have mentally dug for yourself,
there is always a way.
It begins with a note from a friend. A knock on
your door, a spoken word overheard that grabs
your attention and pierces your heart.
An email from someone arriving right just as
you think you have sealed off the world completely
suddenly shakes the very foundation.
In the once stuffy confines you suddenly and
dramatically feel a breath of fresh air. There's
someone pounding on the walls relentlessly
because they know you're in there and they
won't stop until you come out.
Why? Because love penetrates all. It softens
the hardest hearts. It soothes the most painful
loss. It extinguishes the fires of loneliness
and surrounds you like a blanket on a cold night.
Buried deep in doubt and depression it takes
awhile for your eyes to adjust to the brightness
and beauty of the day until the very moment when
you look around and realize how very much you
are needed and the world does indeed have
a place for you in it.
If you shut yourself off. God will break through.
He sent me to today just to say "I love you."
"I wish you enough!"
~ Bob Perks ~
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