Rudolph's Awesome Yule-Rule

"Tell me," asked the young reindeer,
"Daddy, tell me why it's so
That Christmas comes but once a year,
I'd really like to know.
Although I'm not a year old yet,
They tell me that it's grand.
Why can't Christmas be every day?
I just don't understand!"

"I'm glad you asked," said Rudolph,
"Since I'm leader of the sleigh,
I've spent many a Christmas
Guiding Santa on his way.
And when you're old enough
I hope to hand this job to you,
And so, all things considered, son,
I guess it's time you knew.

"This job is complicated,
It's not one of trial and error:
A year of days just laying-back,
Then one night of sheer terror!
We gotta haul that Fat Man
And his giant toy-filled sack
Around the world in one quick night,
And then we haul him back!

"And if you think the load's too much,
Then think twice! Get a grip!
Just add the milk and cookies
That he wolfs down every trip!
So, if Christmas were every day,
We'd not get any rest!
Remembering what goes to whom
Would prove a dismal test...

"Did Johnny want that video game?
No, he wants one that's faster!
Did Suzy want this dolly? No?
Oh, my! What a disaster!
And me, without the rest I need,
I couldn't keep things straight ~
I'd flub-up where the good kids live,
As we go state-to-state.
"We'd be pooped-out! We'd fly too low,
And hit the tops of trees!
We'd go so slow that ice would coat
Our antlers till we'd freeze!
Poor Santa's brain would soon become
So discombobulated!
He'd get our names so mixed-up
That we'd all be addlepated!"

"On, Compid! No, that's Cupet!
Steady, boys! No, I mean Vixer!
On, Dancen!...Make that Prancen!
No, dadburnit! I mean Blitzer!
To the summit of that mountain there!
Oh, no! Wait! That's a wall!
Sorry, boys! That's quite a fall!"

"So, son, you see, the job alone
Would stress us till we die!
And then our poor dead bodies
Would fill-up the night-time sky!
Then there'd be all those road-signs
And those billboards we hear of:
'Watch out for falling reindeer!'
As we splat folks from above!

"Then folks would all curse Santa,
And all reindeer they would fear!
So, that's why I have made this rule:
One Christmas Day per year!"


So, folks, next time you hear a child yell,
"Wow! It's Christmas Day!"
And how he wishes it would last,
If he just had his way...
Then please repeat this tale to him:
"Rudolph's Awesome Yule-Rule."
Then, dude, high-five and walk away ~
I'll bet he answers "C-O-O-OL!"


[ by: Connie Hinnen Cook ( -- from Connie Hinnen Cook ]


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